There was a homeless man last night at the Cheesecake Factory. At least I suspect he’s homeless. It was pouring rain outside and he was drenched, sitting in the doorway of the restaurant with two plastic bags full of newspapers and clothes.
While my friends and I were waiting to be seated, he asked if I had a spare cigarette. I told him I didn’t smoke, but if he was hungry we could get him something. He took us up on our offer. So we got him a meal to go, gave him a $10 bill, an umbrella, and the number to the local men’s shelter down the road.
I made sure the shelter had room for him and let them know he may be calling, and then my friends and I were seated. As we sat, celebrating my dear friend’s birthday with pasta and cheesecake, I couldn’t stop thinking about the man I had just met.
All I kept thinking was, why didn’t I invite him to eat with us? Why didn’t I add one more person to our party of five? The birthday girl would have understood. She has a similar heart towards the poor. So why didn’t I? I made excuses in my head. My husband wasn’t with me, so it was a safety issue. It wasn’t fair to the birthday girl. He would have kept asking for more from us and then it would have been awkward. And heaven forbid Christians ever feel awkward and uncomfortable when serving.
A waitress at the restaurant commented on how nice our group was to help this man, and that almost made the situation worse. Did I help him? Really help him? Or did I just satisfy my guilty conscience?
This has been a conviction I have struggled with for a while, many times hesitating to do what I feel led to do because I don’t want to impose on the people with me. Or impose on myself. I think I’m afraid truly loving the poor will become an inconvenience, but how selfish is that?
Photo Credit: frankservayge
Suffering man… check. Compassionate Christ_follower… check. Kind, loving response… check. Pleasure in Father’s heart… check. You did good, and you did well. But the enemy of our souls is at work here, too. If he can’t get you to sin, if he can’t get you to neglect to do good, he’ll attempt to make you feel guilt for not having done some other (higher or perhaps ultimate) good. If he can’t put some distance between you & your Father, he’ll just try to make tou feel like there is. A hungry, homeless man was fed & sheltered. The Father is proud, and you are not. I think what took place on the night in question is called righteousness, and not anything less.
I completely agree with Cliff. I think your reaction shows an incredible sensitivity to the Spirit. You felt the Spirit's prompting and you showed that gentleman Christ's compassion. In doing so, a little bit of heaven and a little bit of earth met just outside Cheesecake Factory. I'm so proud to call you a friend. What a picture of grace and compassion. Thanks for moving my heart and challenging me.
I struggle with those boundaries as well. How much money do you give? How much time do you spend? What about the safety of yourself and your family? There is always a need that can be meet and at what point do you stop helping? Only if it risks ____________????
Someone said (read it somewhere): "Giving isn't giving until it alters your lifestyle." Okay, so my lifestyle is altered but are we supposed to keep giving until our time and money and safety are all compromised? Or is that the whole point? I guess you could ask yourself who does more good for the poor, Shane Claiborne (giving away everything and living with the poor) or Bill Gates (incredibly rich guy who gives away more money than anybody). Maybe we're somewhere in the middle?
You have articulated my struggle very well Chad. I also believe it is in the middle and my constant question is, what does that middle look like? And if we follow the life of Jesus, I think it's going to look more extreme than we would like.
My "middle" is dictated by culture and society. Not in the regard of what is too much but more along the line of what is just enough. I think it is pretty clear we all don't need to be driving Mercedes when Honda Civics will do. Nor should we assume an alarm system is unnecessary in a neighborhood with a high crime rate, right?
The "middle" is dictated by what is reasonable, in my context, to have and what is extra fluff. Is a house (shelter) necessary? Are clothes necessary? Are relationships necessary? Is food necessary? I say yes to all. Matthew 25 tells me to take care of necessities, but it doesn't say I need to buy the homeless a meal at a 5-star restaurant, right?
The challenge is what we do with cable, internet, entertainment, washer and dryer, sprinklers in my back yard, etc. Are those things bad? Nope. But is Jesus calling me to live in a small studio apartment opposed to living in a small house with a backyard and Directv?
I think living like Jesus would have been more clear before the industrial revolution. We've insulated ourselves so much with technology and modern conveniences that it is hard to comprehend living outside of them. I can hardly communicate with my community (Church) without Facebook on my phone!
What are needs and what are wants? What is necessary and what is privilege?
Hey shawnsmucker, where can I find that quote for CS Lewis?
No worries, I found it. Typed it into Google! It is in Mere Christianity page 86. Thanks for getting back to me though, it is a fantastic quote.