the blog
can moving change us
by scott
November 16, 2009 | Uncategorized | one response
A friend of mine is absolutely desperate to move away from his hometown. He and I share the same hometown and we both have a desire to leave, but his desperation just might surpass my desire. When most people want to move the first question anyone asks them is Why. Why would you want to move? Why leave what you have going for you here? Why would you be so selfish? But my question for him is, what do you expect to find there? We’ve all heard the expression “wherever you go, there you are.”
You cannot escape yourself.
When city…county…state…country borders are crossed, can you expect an instant change?
What happens when you get settled in your new apartment or house and one month in you discover all your same habits exists in this place too?
Can the same question be asked when you become a Christian? When you were saved, was it an overnight cure-all? Did you wake up the following morning to discover you were completely debt free, no longer an alcoholic, and had the spark back in your marriage?
Perhaps its a process. More like a dimmer switch slowly rotating and illuminating a room, as illustrated by Shane Hipps in his book Flickering Pixels.
A move could spark that desire. It might force you out of your comfort zone just enough that you start down the path of becoming the person you long to be.
Overnight? Perhaps.
I have not done much moving in my life compared to my wife. She is a missionary kid who has grown up as a "third culture kid". She has lived her life in multiple cultures but never one that she has been able to claim as her own. I, on the other hand, grew up in the same country area for 24 years. So as you might imagine, my wife hated the idea of moving because all she ever wanted to find is "home" and I always wanted to move because all I ever knew was "home".
I thought a move would mean possibility, newness and adventure. I didn't know that a move is so much more than a change in physical location. It uproots your routines. It disconnects you from support groups, both positive and negative. It creates too many feelings to list here as you go through a process of leaving "home". Then you re/learn the answer to "what is home?" as you become acclimated to a new place, people and things.
But I completely agree that you are still who you are when you leave. However, all the change might bring to light the "you" that you never new existed because you had never had to deal with the "foreigner syndrome".
You pointed out that the challenges of relocating foster change in some people quickly and others over a long period of time. Either way, I know that for me and my wife a move has always meant change, both in and around us. Some of that change has been positive and some has been negative. The bottom line is that a move will change you.